How Andrea Reclaimed Health Anxiety and Bladder Symptoms

[00:00:00] So before I took this program, I was spending so much money on different doctors trying to
[00:00:05] figure out what was wrong. I was diagnosed with interstitial cystitis and constantly going
[00:00:11] to the bathroom worrying that it was something I was eating, restricting my eating, tracking
[00:00:17] everything, stressing out, not being able to enjoy my life because I was worrying like,
[00:00:22] oh, if I have a beer, what's going to happen? If I eat buffalo wings, what's going to
[00:00:26] happen? And it was kind of morphing into also vulvodynia. And I was having all these symptoms
[00:00:34] that were just making my life miserable. So when I joined and I just accepted that these were
[00:00:41] mind-body symptoms, and I learned like, what a nervous system in safety feels like,
[00:00:48] things started to change. Like, I don't track any of my food. I eat whatever I want now.
[00:00:54] I haven't gone to a specialist for this since last August or seen any doctors. So I just thank Grace
[00:01:00] and her program so much. Hey there, and welcome to the Heal with Grace podcast. I'm your host,
[00:01:07] Grace Secker, and I'm a holistic licensed therapist and nervous system coach who believes
[00:01:12] that the chronic and often unseen symptoms you're living with are a sign of something
[00:01:17] deeper going on. A sign that your nervous system needs attention. In each episode,
[00:01:22] I'll share the science behind the most common chronic health disorders, plus holistic tips
[00:01:28] using mental, physical, and spiritual practices. You'll hear what I've learned in my journey
[00:01:32] and the true stories from our trusted guests so you can feel less alone in your experience
[00:01:37] and give yourself grace, no matter what you're going through. So without further ado,
[00:01:42] settle in and get cozy. It's time to heal with grace.
[00:01:46] Hey Andrea, thank you so much for coming on. I'm excited to hear where you are now and
[00:01:51] just how your story has been. So I appreciate it. Thanks for coming on.
[00:01:55] You're welcome. I'm excited. Why don't you just give everyone a little bit of an idea of like,
[00:02:00] who are you? Where do you live and why are you even here? Why did you even start the
[00:02:04] My Body Healing Method? Yeah, I am a mom of two. I'm here in upstate New York. I'm also
[00:02:11] a lactation counselor and I own an online business and I've had this high stress
[00:02:19] personality my whole life, but I came to find you on Instagram and this most recent health
[00:02:27] crisis that I had been having for the past two years, which is, I guess, technically interstitial
[00:02:34] cystitis, which like I had experienced my first bout of it. Looking back, it seems like I have
[00:02:41] had it like for a really long time and just hadn't really been diagnosed. But like 10 years
[00:02:48] ago, before I even had kids, that was my first like bout of doctors and all this testing and that's
[00:02:53] when I was first like given that. But it was always this thing of like this diagnosis of exclusion.
[00:02:59] So I really never bought into that, especially because like after I had my kids like during my
[00:03:04] pregnancy, it all went away. So I was like, okay, I really don't have that. So whatever.
[00:03:10] Fast forward to 2024, I started noticing, you know, that I was like peeing a lot. So if
[00:03:16] you don't know what interstitial cystitis is, the best way to describe it is like,
[00:03:19] you feel like you have a UTI, but you don't have a UTI. There's no bacteria present. So yeah,
[00:03:24] it's not fun. So when that started happening again, I was like, okay, you know, started by
[00:03:30] going to the doctors and they obviously like diagnose you with the UTI. So I wasn't really
[00:03:35] like privy to this being that same condition from 10 years ago until it started, you know,
[00:03:43] ramping up and it did so ramp up, change, morph into different symptoms for the last
[00:03:50] two years up until November of 2025 when I found you. So I can go into a little more detail.
[00:03:55] I don't want to jump right out of the gate with my whole story, but that's basically why I found
[00:04:00] you because I was like at the end of the like, could be this, could it be this, could it be
[00:04:04] this, could it be this and like nothing was working. Did you have any other types of health
[00:04:11] diagnoses or concerns or issues along with that either, you know, back before being pregnant or
[00:04:16] now anything else that went along with it? Well, I've always had anxiety, like Ben medicated. I
[00:04:22] went through a period of time shortly after 2020 for about a year and a half with like joint pain,
[00:04:29] like completely unexplained bordering on like fibromyalgia being mentioned. But again,
[00:04:35] that's another diagnosis that was just exclusion. It's like, well, we don't know what's wrong with
[00:04:41] you. So here's a label. So then it like magically went away. So I have had these little bouts of
[00:04:50] these unexplainable symptoms throughout my life. And that's kind of why I started exploring this
[00:04:56] mind body stuff because that was one of the key components of having one of these psychosomatic
[00:05:03] conditions where you have these conditions and they come and go throughout your whole life.
[00:05:07] Can you track two times like when it was heightened versus when it went away? Do you
[00:05:13] associate that with anything going on in life? No, not really. I'm not one that has specific
[00:05:21] traumatic incidents that spike that. I kept thinking that was no, it can't be this because
[00:05:26] I don't have any like huge trauma. But I think it's from doing your work and reading
[00:05:31] some other books, I think it's more the personality aspect of just my nervous system constantly being
[00:05:37] activated by day to day life where it must just build and build and build and build until it
[00:05:42] can't take it anymore. Tell me more about that. Like what did you learn about your
[00:05:45] personality characteristics and the anxiety that you saw correlated or affected your
[00:05:51] health, the conditions? Constantly like living in fear. A lot of the times being like
[00:05:58] in fight or flight and a lot of my anxiety is health-based and like hypochondriac, I guess,
[00:06:06] not like diagnosed or anything, but like worrying about different health conditions,
[00:06:10] googling, spiraling, that sort of stuff. But from a very early age, I was just raised,
[00:06:15] this could happen, this could happen. You better be careful like constant vigilance,
[00:06:20] constant hypervigilance. So I think that is the main thing.
[00:06:26] Yeah, and I remember that early on too when we were talking about it.
[00:06:30] In the beginning, the main concern where you were like, well, I don't know if I can get out of
[00:06:32] this because I'm just so fixated on it. I'm so hypervigilant towards it and always
[00:06:36] questioning and wondering. And before, I think you would calm this down like you said,
[00:06:40] but before you were going to a bunch of different doctors and specialists, right?
[00:06:43] But at the point where I was talking to you, you were like, well, I don't,
[00:06:46] why would I do it? It doesn't help. But you still were in the spiral of thinking about
[00:06:49] it. What helped you get out of that then? I'm fully 100% believing that your mind is causing
[00:06:58] your symptoms is the only way to get out of them. Because if you keep thinking, well,
[00:07:04] maybe if I go to this doctor and maybe if I try to take this, it's still telling your brain,
[00:07:10] this is something that needs to be fixed and this is not safe. So once I just
[00:07:16] fully accepted it, and it was a very long process because I didn't happen upon your stuff. And that
[00:07:22] was the first time I ever heard of my body. I have the book, unlearn your pain. And I read,
[00:07:27] what's the other one, the way out. But I never fully believed, like even though doing the work,
[00:07:33] I think investing in the program is what made me be like, okay, well, I invested in this,
[00:07:38] so I need to do this now. Is there anything else around that that you feel like that was
[00:07:42] the time for you? Because there's a lot of people like that too. Like I've read the books,
[00:07:44] I listen to your podcast all the time. It's still circling, right? Was there anything else
[00:07:50] that really helped you lean in? It's just like being at the end of the rope of like,
[00:07:54] I'm not going to spend more money on doctors. What is the point? There's like zero point
[00:08:00] of going to the doctor, getting another prescription, getting your hopes up that this
[00:08:05] is going to work, then it doesn't, being frustrated, then you spend all this money
[00:08:09] and like, it's still not better. Which is all the risk too, like taking any program is a risk.
[00:08:18] You could spend money and you could not be better, but it just so happened that this
[00:08:23] was the thing that improved things for me. Yeah, exactly. There's people that go through
[00:08:28] multiple different programs, right? And for some reason, time, place, cognition, environment,
[00:08:35] they end up making progress in one of them. And for you, this was it.
[00:08:39] So, and it happened. I remember there was struggle in the beginning and then it was like
[00:08:42] one week you showed up and you're like, it went away. What was that? Do you know what
[00:08:48] clicked for you? Was it just timing and practice? Yeah, I was just doing the practices.
[00:08:54] And then there's been flare ups. I don't want to make it seem like I'm symptom-free all the time
[00:08:59] because then once you feel better, then you stop doing this stuff and you're like,
[00:09:03] oh, I don't need to do this anymore. It's all fixed. But then something comes back.
[00:09:07] So I probably need to be better about that. But when it does come back, I just don't freak out.
[00:09:12] I'm like, well, this is going to pass. This is irrelevant to my life. I'm still going to
[00:09:18] do this, do whatever I want. That was the main thing that had me so
[00:09:22] miserable as far as the condition. And the symptoms weren't... I don't have it bad as
[00:09:28] other people. I'm not going to lie. They were livable. They were just very, very annoying
[00:09:33] and frustrating. So I am able to ignore them. But before that, they were always on the back
[00:09:40] of my mind. But once I was just like, yeah, this is a symptom. And I can go pee if I need to go
[00:09:48] pee. It's not that big of a deal. Then I started... Over those two years before I joined the
[00:09:54] program, I would alternate between interstitial cystitis and vulvodynia, which is just...
[00:09:59] Okay, you feel like you have a yeast infection, but there's no yeast infection. That was, I think,
[00:10:04] worse deal than just having to pee. I think that's what keep coming back. That was what
[00:10:10] really made me be like, okay, I need to invest in this because that's annoying. But
[00:10:15] even if those sort of things do come up, I just think to myself, well, this is going to go away
[00:10:20] soon. So it's a non-issue. And I keep going through with my normal life. Everything is fine.
[00:10:27] The main things that made it so miserable were avoiding things that I really like, like food,
[00:10:32] going through a billion different diets, which I think just makes things worse because that even
[00:10:37] gets you into more hypervigilance. Like, oh my God, I ate a banana. What if this happens? You
[00:10:44] know what I mean? Like not being able to enjoy life, worrying every time you go out,
[00:10:50] or should I have a drink? Like, what if I have a drink and then I have to pee,
[00:10:55] like just worrying about all that is like really disruptive to life. So once I just started
[00:11:02] eating whatever I want without a care, drinking whatever I want without a care,
[00:11:06] like the symptoms improved. So now what does it look like with food, diet,
[00:11:13] symptoms like week to week? I don't, I eat whatever I want. I drink whatever I want.
[00:11:19] I don't worry about what it's going to do because now I know that that's not what's
[00:11:24] causing my symptoms like without a doubt. It doesn't make sense like that it would.
[00:11:29] Like I was tracking very, very religiously, which again just makes you more like hypervigilance.
[00:11:34] It just makes you more in the spiral and like going down the rabbit hole. But like I did it all.
[00:11:40] Like do you have to do that to get to a place where you believe that it's not your
[00:11:45] problem maybe? Yeah. But like now I just know it's not my issue. So why would I like
[00:11:51] restrict myself? And I was also restricting things that were like healthy. So that's not
[00:11:55] healthy either. Right. Right. It makes it so much worse. And I mean, to be honest,
[00:12:02] I can't answer this for everyone. But yeah, you have to go through that to get to this point.
[00:12:07] Most people's story is because that's the way that we see our health and what you do to
[00:12:13] treat your physical health. Right. So probably and sometimes it eliminates the constant
[00:12:18] searching of well maybe there's more because you've unturned every stone.
[00:12:20] So you're like, okay, I'll try this mind body thing. Right. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:12:25] It happens just as what it is at this point.
[00:12:29] Would you like if you could tell yourself or someone that was in your position when
[00:12:33] you were constantly searching knowing what you know now, would you tell them something
[00:12:38] different or what would you say? Yeah, I always tell I'm like I tell people this all
[00:12:42] the time stop wasting money on these functional doctors stop giving up glue and it's not
[00:12:50] going to do anything. It's making you miserable. Stop pouring money into more
[00:12:55] prescriptions and stay away from Reddit. I love that last one. Perfect. Reddit and Facebook.
[00:13:03] Yeah, no, I quit Facebook groups like a long time ago. I do remember in 2015 when I was first,
[00:13:09] you know, diagnosed with interstitial cystitis, like joining this Facebook group.
[00:13:15] And it was so depressing and so sad all the time. And then like I played a little bit around with
[00:13:21] Reddit like as one does, because you're just so desperate. But it's just so much better just
[00:13:27] not looking at it ever. I will never go into another medical Reddit ever again.
[00:13:34] Good. It sounds like then you're really solid in the approach. Like even in
[00:13:40] you have a flare, if things come up, right, you recognize there's nothing physical you
[00:13:43] did. So you don't look at your diet. You don't go look at what did I eat that could have caused
[00:13:47] this or what did I do, right? You're just moving through it, moving on.
[00:13:51] Yeah. Like I knew that I could have a flare up a couple of weeks ago because like I could feel
[00:13:57] my body like I was having daily crash outs with my kids. We home school and you'd think it'd be
[00:14:03] like easier with summer and not having to do schoolwork. But like it wasn't easier because
[00:14:08] they were unstructured and I was having crash outs with them about like, you know,
[00:14:13] screen time and like fighting and stuff and my body really started to feel that. So of course,
[00:14:17] I'm having a flare and I'm like, of course this is happening because my nervous system has been
[00:14:22] just freaking out the past week. So like then I have to go back to like the meditations and stuff.
[00:14:29] So you do recognize that, right? You can, like you said, you can feel in your body when
[00:14:33] you're probably past your capacity. Your nervous system is stressed.
[00:14:37] Yeah. Okay. And so you know what to do then when you feel that.
[00:14:41] Yeah. I think that's really important. That's what, I don't know if you say I am recovered or
[00:14:45] I just don't have it anymore. What words you use. There's a bunch of different words, but
[00:14:49] I mean, that's pretty much what it's about. Understanding your body signals,
[00:14:53] helping yourself move through it and then overarching seeing, okay, what can I do overall
[00:14:58] week to week day to day to set myself up. But you also can't be perfect. I mean, you're
[00:15:03] not, there's stress in life. Yeah. I don't know if I'd use the word I'm recovered. I'm better.
[00:15:12] It's just like whatever symptoms, they're just like irrelevant. And also like with health anxiety,
[00:15:18] I guess there's a term called body noise where you don't have to pay attention to every single
[00:15:24] ache and pain or like just random thing. Your body is like a body in the world. There's
[00:15:30] going to be different things that it does and you don't have to like spiral or like start googling.
[00:15:36] Like, you know, my left toe hurts. Do I have cancer? Which is what I do normally.
[00:15:43] That's a pretty big shift then from googling something like that, right? Going to be extreme.
[00:15:49] Yeah. To being at his body noise. Yeah. I worked through a lot of that stuff with a therapist.
[00:15:55] Yeah. Over the years, like COVID actually helped a lot because, you know,
[00:16:01] where some people got super hyper vigilant and like OCD, I guess for lack of a better word,
[00:16:06] during COVID, I kind of was just like, well, I don't know, you can't control everything. Like,
[00:16:14] it is what it is. So like, I just work through that kind of tolerating different things that
[00:16:18] were happening in my body or tolerating different health risks and stuff.
[00:16:26] That's the treatment, if you will, for health anxiety and or OCD type thoughts. Yeah.
[00:16:32] Is learning to tolerate and be okay with it being unknown, essentially. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was,
[00:16:36] yeah. And that plays a part in the, like you were talking about before, the personality
[00:16:41] and what was my personality type that like caused this. And I think that was the main thing
[00:16:47] is fear around uncertainty. So again, like, this isn't just about the symptom. Like, I think I might
[00:16:53] have said this to you in a groove or something, but I feel like this is not just about, this was
[00:16:58] never just about like the symptoms. It's like, I need to change my whole personality. Not like,
[00:17:05] change my personality, but change the way I approach life. And that's the thing I don't think
[00:17:10] I can say I'm recovered. I'm not like, Oh, yay. Like, I have zero anxiety now. Like, but now just
[00:17:17] haven't been cognizant of that stat as a thing. Some people go through their whole life. They don't
[00:17:22] even know. They don't even know how to examine their thoughts, right? I don't know if this is
[00:17:28] getting too technical. Like, they don't even know that like their thoughts are not them or
[00:17:35] and their thoughts are not real. Like just even knowing that is like a step. So it really is,
[00:17:42] I think, a much bigger picture than like, let me get this symptom gone. Even though that can
[00:17:51] happen as a result. Exactly. Exactly. That is oftentimes that's how you get to this work,
[00:17:58] obviously. But there's so much more that comes from it. That's actually the whole point in the first
[00:18:06] place. And yeah, whatever comes from that can be a decrease in symptoms or less body noise or
[00:18:12] something like that, because we're not fixating on it or fearful of it. And we're learning to
[00:18:16] separate ourselves from our thoughts or feelings, whatever's happening. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's
[00:18:22] important. I'm glad you said that. Yeah. One of the things I was just from your program where it was
[00:18:28] it went through all the feelings. And then it was like, instead of saying like, I am angry,
[00:18:33] it's like, I feel angry. And then like, I'm aware that I feel angry, like taking those steps.
[00:18:41] That was really helpful. Trying to think of what else I did frequently. I did the like the
[00:18:47] heart coherence one pretty frequently. Tell me more about that. Why did you go to that?
[00:18:55] Because I like how it says like visualize or feel in your body, like a feeling of joy.
[00:19:04] I think like trying to kind of go through life with that feeling is like very, very helpful. And
[00:19:10] that it's not like a thought, right? It's like a feeling and that to me helps me recognize safety
[00:19:17] in my nervous system, which like we don't normally feel that every day. You're not like going through
[00:19:21] doing the dishes like feeling that euphoria sort of feeling. But like it's still available to you.
[00:19:29] So like understanding that that's what it means when your nervous system feels safe is
[00:19:34] really important. It's learning not only what that feels like, but bringing it about more and
[00:19:41] more. Yeah. We have to intentionally feel it, bring it because you're right, it doesn't just
[00:19:47] automatically happen at all really. No. Yeah. Yeah. What else helped you? Anything else that really
[00:19:56] anxiety? Bringing about that feeling, this is so corny.
[00:20:02] Let's have it. Sometimes in that particular meditation, it's like, think of a time where
[00:20:07] like you felt just joy and freedom. And a lot of the times it'd be like when I'm on vacation,
[00:20:13] because like I have all the other times I'm like rushing around, let's do this,
[00:20:17] look at this, it's a mess, let's clean, like, you know, gotta get this school work done.
[00:20:21] But like when you're on vacation, like all of that is gone. So like that was something
[00:20:26] that I would frequently think of. So I tried to like channel like, okay, I'm like on vacation
[00:20:32] vibes throughout my day. And then another thing that I would frequently think of
[00:20:36] is like, I would always think of myself when I went to the Ares tour, like the feeling of
[00:20:41] like this euphoria that I felt. And like, so listening to music was a severely underrated
[00:20:48] tool because it allows you to be in your body and just kind of feel that. So those are two things
[00:20:54] I kept going back to as well. So you used those tools to help your body come into that state of
[00:21:00] joy, euphoria, presence. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And not in anxiety, fear, or whatever. Yeah.
[00:21:09] Whatever else was causing the stress. Yeah. Okay. When did you first notice something
[00:21:15] was actually changing? I think when I stopped, like, because I would mentally think about in my head,
[00:21:23] it's always like, okay, when's the last time I peed and give myself a gold star if it had been
[00:21:29] three hours or something. You know what I mean? It's just constant all day thinking, okay,
[00:21:34] I last peed. It's kind of like similar to when you're like breastfeeding a baby and you're
[00:21:37] okay, when did I last feed? When's the next feed going to be like, so when I stopped actively
[00:21:43] occupying brain space with like, when I'm going to have to pee? That's like a win.
[00:21:48] Yes. Because it's going in the background. It's not constantly in the forefront of what are your
[00:21:54] symptoms? When did you pee? How was your body? Yeah. I think it's one of the most helpful
[00:21:58] things because like you said, it changes your day to day. It doesn't take up so much space.
[00:22:02] Yeah. Right. In mind space. So yeah, that makes sense. Okay. Is there anything else that we
[00:22:07] haven't talked about that you think is important to know that was helpful for you that other
[00:22:12] people should know about this work? Another thing I did was I stopped using, I don't know if this is
[00:22:17] good advice for everyone, but like depends on your condition, but like I stopped using any like of
[00:22:22] the medications that I had gotten the creams and stuff because if I was going to go into it like
[00:22:28] fully believing it was my mind, then I didn't need this cream. So really haven't and then like
[00:22:33] if I did use a cream or like, I mean, I didn't take any pills. Like if I did use a cream,
[00:22:38] I'd be like, Oh, this is just like for dry skin. Like I wasn't like, Oh, this is going to fix this
[00:22:43] condition. And then I did stop going to doctors. Like obviously I went for my checkup and all that.
[00:22:48] But like I stopped seeking out different doctors. I had an appointment with a specialist that I
[00:22:53] canceled. I just stopped all that. You're right. And it depends totally on the condition, but
[00:22:59] the nuance like you just said is if you were going to use it, it was just maybe a little
[00:23:05] support, right? Or dry skin instead of I have to use these things or else. I have to use these things
[00:23:11] to fix or else I'm going to be having symptoms. That's the big shift. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Well,
[00:23:19] thank you so much for sharing the story. As you know, it helps other people to hear. And it's
[00:23:24] great to hear where you are now too, just to understand that your living life and it
[00:23:28] doesn't have to lead your life and take up so much space. Yeah. But I think it's just
[00:23:34] important to have all these tools in case, you know, something else pops up as it does. Exactly.
[00:23:39] It does. I mean, you know, as everyone else on here, if you've been listening, know my story
[00:23:43] of all the different symptoms, then the tools and the skills are super important to do when
[00:23:49] you're feeling something come up, right? But I think at least just to echo what you said,
[00:23:54] the overall understanding and knowing actually where the symptoms are coming from was one of
[00:23:59] the biggest shifts for you because you didn't keep constantly questioning, well, what if it's
[00:24:02] this or what if it's this, right? Yeah. And I would say the same for myself too. I mean,
[00:24:06] it's the biggest thing that has helped me. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, thank you so much again.
[00:24:13] And because you are an online business owner or anything, I'll link things below, but is
[00:24:18] there anything you want to share with people? Yeah. So like I said, I have an online business
[00:24:22] for breastfeeding moms and, you know, breastfeeding activism. It's at instinctual
[00:24:28] mothering. I share a lot on there about, you know, protecting mother baby. And I also have
[00:24:34] another account where I help business owners grow on social media. And that is at social boob.
[00:24:40] I love that. I love being cheekable mother one. I know that page and I love it,
[00:24:43] but I didn't know you did that. So yeah, I just started doing it because,
[00:24:47] you know, people would ask me like, how'd you grow? And,
[00:24:52] yeah, I just help anyone in like the motherhood space that wants to grow.
[00:24:56] Cool. All right. Thank you. You are welcome. And I will speak to everyone next week. Take care.
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[00:25:22] more people, it would mean so much to me so I can continue sharing episodes that help you
[00:25:28] as well as others. Thanks for listening and I hope this brings you hope on your journey.